A Thanksgiving Gratitude Series

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday.  It reminds me to pause, feel, and express gratitude.  In all of my years as a psychologist I can truly say that the presence of an ongoing feeling of gratitude is the healthiest, most life affirming emotion available to us.  In this past Tuesday’s NY Times science section there was an article summarizing the research on gratitude.  Those who were continually grateful were happier, less depressed (if at all), had better relationships, more energy, lived longer, dealt better with stress, were more productive at work, were more generous…the list goes on. On this special day, Thanksgiving, we recognize those specific things, people, and events that have enhanced our lives.  I personally endeavor to live Thanksgiving 365 days a year; and while our lives always have ups and downs, stressors and challenges, bearing in mind those gifts that we are surrounded by, big and small, is always quite identifiable if we just take a slow deep breath, and become aware. And most importantly, I always keep in mind the wonder, miracle if you will, of this enterprise of life, and the infinite beauty of existence.

Dr. Mark Vogel

A Thanksgiving Gratitude Series

Since I began working at FFS in 1988, Bob and I have celebrated almost every Thanksgiving with the students. That would mean that the 17-year old students with whom we first celebrated would be just about forty years old now. On this special day of the year set aside for gratitude, I give my prayer of thanks for all those recoveries that we were privileged to be a part of over the years.  I look through my mind’s eye at a sea of young faces, and remember their stories and how close they allowed us to be to them.  How fortunate we are to have been able to give and receive so much love!

Wishing everyone a Happy Thanksgiving,

Susan Runge (and Uncle Bob)

A Thanksgiving Gratitude Series

Many of the students with whom I work, and their families, are facing heartbreaking situations. They have family members who are terminally ill, or their family structures have broken down due to addiction and/or divorce or death or other significant losses. In some instances, their communication and attachment to each other have been severely damaged for years. By all statistical measures, these students are at high risk for permanent damage and family estrangement.

I am profoundly grateful that many of these students and families are opening up, allowing me to bear witness to their pain, and are putting in the hard work to re-establish lines of communication and strategies to move past illness and addiction and toward recovery and health. Through them, I continually get to see both God’s presence in our lives and the knowledge that the human spirit and capacity for healing are stronger than any obstacles that life may bring.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Mary Burkart

A Thanksgiving Gratitude Series

I know that I am blessed to be able take the students to rehab’s so they can share experience, strength and hope with young people in recovery. Seeing the joy that our students find in doing 12 step work is fantastic to say the least. In this and many other things that I am involved with, with the students, I am truly grateful for.

Mike Losicco

Mike,

I wanted to take a moment to thank you, not only what you do to help and support our daughter and our family, but also all the other kids and their familes as well.

With gratitude and appreciation,

D. R.

Dear Jeff,

Please allow us to tell you how much the Family Foundation School means to us in helping us get our son back.  For two years we looked into sending our son to a therapeutic boarding school for various bad behaviors and choices.  He had drug issues, respect issues, he was stealing and lying without remorse and he did not believe in God.  The Family Foundation School came highly recommended to us and every time we got a new brochure from other schools, we always came back to The Family Foundation School because your school seemed to have everything he needed.

Our has been came to your in 2009 and the change in him has been remarkable.  He has been taught to respect, he has been taught to be accountable for his actions and he has learned to believe in God again, as well as learning from his academic classes as well.  He is back to being the boy we once knew just a few short years ago and we love what we see every time we come to visit him, and we love what we hear when we speak to him on the phone.  We have only the staff at The Family Foundation School and the way the school is run to thank for this change in our son.

Sincerely,

B. and K. O.

Dear FFS:

Words cannot express the gratitude I feel for the work that you all do at FFS.

My son’s behavior was so out-of-control that he had become a danger to himself.  We felt that he would either die young or end up in jail.  After numerous attempts to get help for him without any success, we enrolled him at the FFS approximately 15 months ago.

The progress he has shown is nothing short of amazing.  FFS is helping him take a good look at himself and arming him with the tools he will need to live a fulfilling life.

When I think of my son’s stay at FFS throughout the past 15 months, one incident has left a big impression on me.  My son ran away back in late October, 2009.  My initial reaction was “how could they let this happen”.  However, I soon learned how efficient and honest the staff was in dealing with the whole situation.  Shortly thereafter, we had a family group and I was thunderstruck at how much the staff cared about my son.  It became very clear to me that this was not just a job for the staff, they truly care about the students.

We enrolled our son at FFS because he had a problem, but you have given us the opportunity to realize that as parents, we also need to work on our parenting skills.  The workshops and family groups which have been offered throughout our son’s enrollment have had a tremendous impact on us and have provided us with the tools to improve our parental skills.

I will forever be grateful for the gift that has been bestowed upon my family and I, and for lack of better words – Thank you from deep within my heart.

Sincerely,

L. E.

Dear Jeff,

I hope this letter finds you and yours well.  I want to take this opportunity to update you on my sons progress and my gratitude. I can’t believe it’s been over a year since he was there!

R. is in his third semester at university.  He continues to go to AA meetings and plans on staying in VA when he graduates. He loves it down there. He continues to enjoy his friendships with other graduates from the Family Foundation School. These friendships along with his sobriety almost didn’t happen, had he not attended the FFS.

As you may recall he was in deep trouble when he came to you. His father was dying and he was numbing himself with more and more narcotics and alcohol.  As my husband’s caretaker I had little time to contribute to finding the ” right” program for him. But it happened. Less then a week after learning of such a great school he was admitted. During that time he matured beyond expectations.  He was 16 at the time.  He told me early on that ” If not for this school I would most likely be dead”. And I believe that to be true.

The staff had patience and insight that bewildered me. I don’t know how they do it.  My son once said, ” Mom, I don’t know who created the program at the FFS but it really works somehow”. I will never forget these words.

The FFS gave my son the necessary skills to become and remain a productive  and sober member of the community.

Words can not adequately quantify the level of my gratitude to the FFS for being their to save my son and help him to be the wonderful person he is today.

Thank You,

B. B.

Dear Jeff:

I am writing this testimonial letter of our experience at the Family School, where we enrolled our daughter for the last two years of her high school in 2001.

Our story is very similar to many other families where a teenage child goes out of control and engages in dangerous situations.  Our daughter was failing school, engaged in a very disrespectful behavior at home that ended in a domestic violence situation and juvenile hall.  She became a methamphetamine user, got fired from her job and was failing school.  We had tried many other avenues, including outpatient programs, two emergency inpatient intervention, psychologists, etc.  Nothing seemed to help.  The details of our life at that period can be easily imagined by anyone who has been in similar situation.

As the last resource, we engaged a qualified educational consultant who recommended a wilderness camp for two months, and the Family School as a long-term alternative.  Our daughter was in Family 7 from 2001 until her graduation in 2003.  She graduated with high scores, which helped her to obtain a scholarship at a private school in California where she obtained her bachelor’s degree in 2007 with honors.  After working as a research assistant for two years, she’s now enrolled in a Master’s in Public Health program.

Nothing of this would have been a reality today without the intervention of the Family School and the initial work done at Second Nature in Utah.  How did this happen?  It all came to place when my daughter was taught, not easily but lasting, that every action has a consequence, that she was not the center of the world and was not entitled to impose her unacceptable behavior on her family and society.  She was taught to be honest with herself, to analyze her actions and its consequences, to control her impulses, to ask for help, and was held to the high standards by which she leads her life today. It was not an easy process, and it was not without tears and struggle, but it was under the guidance of the family leader, Susan Runge, and with the spiritual help of Father Steven that our family was able to put the pieces together and move on to be in a better place today.  We will forever be grateful.

On the other hand, my daughter was not the only one who learned a lot in the process. When my daughter was away from us, we were able–under the guidance of the school, the 12-step program and the support of the staff and other families–to change the family dynamics and our individual behaviors and to rebuild a stronger family.

As I said before, it was not an easy process and we did not always agree with the school; but we were willing to be open to discuss the reasons for the decisions taken at the school and to accept that she needed more discipline that we were able to give.  We had been back at the school for visits 3-4 times after graduation, July last year was our last visit.

Let me express my eternal gratitude for the work done by The Family School, her family leader and the staff in Family 7, and Father Steven.

Fondly,

H. G.